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Welcome to my wonderland. This is my blog - a place to rant, rave, and roll about anything and everything. Please, no spamming. No cursing. No flaming. I'm entitled to my own opinion, and if you don't like it, press the red [x] to exit.



..while I may be a happy-go-lucky person at times, I am a big dreamer. I love Japanese things, especially the Gothic and Punk stuff..and Ayumi Hamasaki. I also love Anna Sui-ish graphic art. I enjoy singing, composing, drawing, doodling, surfing the net, watching TV, reading, designing clothes, and sleeping. I try my best not to judge people, but I do have the tendency to be snobbish or stupid at times, but I'm not perfect - nor is anyone else. I believe that all people are born with talent, and that everyone is unique. And if you have a problem with that, then get out.
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mimegirl drawing and coding by me, made with Adobe Photoshop CS2. Pixel graphics from Sugar Pink. Music from RadioBlog. Toys and emoticons from Kao-ani.

Sunday, December 14, 2008

ranting time.
okay, I know it's my third post today, but I really, really need to blow off some steam.
I'm so scared of gaining weight.
I mean, why is it that when you lose weight, people really COMPLIMENT and ADORE you..
But when you gain weight, whether for better or worse, they're like . .
"ugh."
I really DO regret what I did when I was in Malaysia.
I won't go into details since I did the WRONG thing.
But now that I'm eating healthy and not overexercising, I'm gaining fat in unwanted places - the lower arms, stomach, and upper thighs, to be exact.
I'm just thankful that they aren't the super obvious areas.
Still, there's no denying that I'm GAINING.
My question is, when the hell will it stop?
I honestly don't wanna go back to how things were like before.
Sometimes, I'm like, 'Just keep doing it. You'll eventually normalize.'
But sometimes, all I can think about is GOING BACK TO MY PAST HABITS.
I mean, it's wrong, but it worked, right?
I always have to convince myself to make decisions for a better FUTURE, not PRESENT.
If I go back to my past habits, then I'm gonna have to battle with it forever.
I'm gonna lose weight, but I'm gonna gain it all back.
I maybe gaining weight now . .
But it's really now or never.

Yuki